That Just Happened...

Here is the explaination of why I freak'n love birds....and my tattoo

Philippians 4:6 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."

Some of you might know, I suffer from Despression/Anxiety. I have for most of my life. I had the worse bout after I had given birth to Monkey M (ppd). I then started a 'healing' type process (without ever really healing since I will battle with this my whole life). Medication, counseling and lots of praying had lead to me to where I am at now...on that road to understanding. Understanding that God does have a werid and odd plan for me, with my depression and anxiety. God has given me words and a sharing spirt to tell people to not be ashamed. That those feelings and emotions...you are not alone. I have been blessed with a great second child, Super C, who has helped in my understanding/healing of my anxiety. With awareness and lots of support, I was able to have a second child.

Yes, its on my wrist...do I regret it? NO. Why? Because each person that asks "what verse is that?" I am able to share a bit of my testamony. To share, that I constantly have to give my requests, my anxiety, to the Lord. Its a reminder, thats why its on my wrist. I can not wash it off! Why facing me? Because its only for me. And when I raise my hands in Praise for Him, He knows the tattoo...and showing that I am presenting my requests to Him.

The Bird on the "P". When Monkey M was young I started to sing to her 'three little birds' (by Bob Marley, But I sing the Elizabeth Mitchell version) as her lullaby. It was my way of starting her young and teaching her "don't worry...about a thing...because every little think is going to be alright." Fast forward to now, its known as "mommy's song" at our house. I remember the first time I sang to Super C...he was screaming and I mean screaming...I started singing that song...and that little baby quieted down. It soothed him, like is soothed Monkey M and it soothes me. The little bird is there as a reminder also.

I feel now I am an open book. The ones closest to me have known this for awhile, but now I am telling you. Its a scary overwhelming thing, anxiety/depression, and I am by no means "healed". It will be a struggle. But its no struggle compaired to what Jesus did for us on the Cross.